Yes, we spanked our child. We spanked our dear, sweet Edith.
All of the new literature out there, all of the current psychologists, all of Edith's pediatrician and teachers, all of the studies I've read, every single Nook reading a Cookbook - everyone out there who is anybody who is anybody says to not spank your child. To put it mildly, spanking is not "in." We were now crossing over to The Dark Side.
Once I had Edith in the car I called her dad and told him we were headed to the house. On the way home I explained to Edith that she had bit again and her dad was coming over and we were going to spank her. Ya know what? I'm going to skip the gory details, but it broke my heart. The Love of My Life did some very good and very stern talking to Edith, making her bawl and squall and I was blowing my nose right along with her. I'm very tough. Very tough indeed. Ha! And if CPS is tracking us down and finds us, I am the one that personally did the spanking when it came right down to it. Four sound smacks on the hind end. It was me. And for the record, I was very proud of The Love of My Life for how he handled the situation, how he was involved in the situation, while all the time resenting him for it because he all calm and collected. Phooey on him!
Later that evening The Love of My Life calls and says one of our old friends....well, wait, this still is his friend just not my friend, suggested play therapy. Play therapy? What the hell is play therapy? I googled it (have I mentioned how much I love google?), and came up with the fact (well, as much as you can call anything from wikipedia.com a fact) that in play therapy a therapist watches children in group play (or engages a single child in play) and psychoanalyzes that child to identify the root cause of their behavioral issues. Sounded like a bunch of hogwash to me, but at this point, I'll try anything, and so will my parenting partner. We decided to consult Edith's pediatrician, since even if we did do this play therapy, we would need a referral from her MD. Besides, she needed a flu shot.
My opinion of her somewhat strange but incredibly intelligent up to this point pediatrician was about to change drastically.
Unrelated note to any concerned members of my phantom fan club:
My roommate thinks the term "Love of My Life" is odd, as my exhusband and I are estranged with no intent to return to the state of marriage. I had to tell her that this has long been my sarcastic term of endearment for the man. It would be great if there was a punctuation that denoted sarcasm. Maybe I'll creat one.....but anyway, The Love of My Life is long to type. I'm considering shortening it to TLML or should it be TLOML? TLML. Or I could just call him Tom and be done with it. Tom. It has a ring to it. Any input from you dears, my phantom fan club, would be greatly appreciated.
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